Blogging apathy

My blog hasn't been much updated lately. There are three primary reasons for this. Firstly, my project to get connected to the net in my appartment keeps on failing. I signed up for a ADSL-connection but the installation queue is 8 weeks.

So, I figured I'd get myself a WLAN-card for surfing meanwhile standing in line, and I did, but the connection was too fable. When I didn't get it to work properly even out on the balcony, I realized that I'll have to live without the net at home for a couple of weeks. The blog posts I have written were born at the office but I've been so busy at work that I truly have not had one minute to spare. And as my partner lives 350 kilometers away from me, when we finally meet in the weekends, other things are on my mind than browsing through the net for interesting papers and thoughts to blog about. Lack of access to and time spent on the net is thus one reason for letting down my dear readers.

The second reason is an identity crisis. Since I'm not primarily a PhD-student anymore, but a media researcher with a paycheck dropping down once a month (which is rare for PhD-students here), I've been thinking about what to do with my blog. Should I go on writing about interesting papers, academia-related issues, even though I don't have as much time to follow these matters? Or, should I broaden the perspectives and blog news, media matters and research in general or make it a more mobile one, for instance blog when I go places?

But the most significant one is the fact that my mother is very ill. She suffers from a, most likely, severe disease that no one of us saw coming. It hit us like a bolt from the blue. Therefore, I've spent many hours with her and my family. While trying to cope with the chock, I played with the thought of blogging my feelings. I still don't think it's such a bad idea to blog one's way through sorrow and the struggle against a fatal disease, but I decided not to until we know for sure all the facts about her condition. I want to have a label on the matter before blogging about it. Perhaps that's just a silly desire of having control but that's how I feel.